Merry Cristmas and Happy New Year, everyone! + some jokes ;)...

Hope everyone had a nice Christmas? Hope a great year is ahead of us too, despite the bad consequences of the number 13, according to some guys ;)! Hope these jokes/anecdotes I found could help anyone to deal better with the time left until the new year's eve! Best of the best wishes!

"Doctor, I feel awful in the morning when I got drunk in the evening before that... Can you give me some advice, tips?"
"Let's see, then... Have you tried not to get drunk in the evening?"
"Oh, yes... I got drunk in the morning instead, but then my head hurt in the evening...

"Hello, Red Riding Hood, " said the big bad wolf. "What are you carrying in your bag?"
And Santa Claus thought to himself: 'Why I had to shave myself???'

A young orphan wrote a letter to Santa Claus: "Dear Santa, I'm a kid without parents and no money and would really like to have a scarf, a coat and a pair of boots for Christmas..." Then addressed the letter with the only address of Santa he knew: To Santa Claus, Lapland. The agents in the post office were really kind and reading the letter, decided to gather some money of theirs and buy this kid the presents. But it turned out their money were enough only to buy him a pair of boots and a coat. When the kid received the presents, he was really happy and wrote back to Santa right away: "Dear Santa! Thank you very much for the presents, but you have to know that the idiots in the post office stole my scarf..."

...and to deal with that, we need a feast which combines many of our traditions, customs and believes... Can we find a better solution  than Christmas?... from my future Space Hide&Seek.

www.allanbard.blogspot.com, www.allanbard.wordpress.com

http://www.goodreads.com/user/show/4159102-ivan-stoikov-allan-bard, www.shelfari.com/allanbard

 http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hit.bg, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov-Fan-Page-Strategic-Book-Group/121092637984053,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qUA8Avl7ew, http://pinterest.com/allanbard/

Some jokes before the new Halloween week, some not good for kids...:)

I hope that I don't disturb some people with some of the jokes/anecdotes I post... I know not all of them are appropriate for kids, yet when there's such an occasion, I usually warn about that at title... Have a nice Halloween, everyone!
 
Sex is an invention of a very smart venereal disease... David Cronenberg.

In the court: "Why you want to divorce with your wife?"
"Every night she goes out and visit a lot of bars..."
"Why is that???"
"She's looking for me..."

A teacher in the kindergarten poured some brandy in the kid's tea so that they could fall asleep quickly in the afternoon... After the police arrested the teacher, the kids took out their savings to pay her bail...

"I wonder why some people are so stupid... Why should they worship actors and actresses, when writers and authors are the ones who must accept all the glory, honors, love, gifts, etc of fans? Actors and actresses just repeat their words and thoughts like parrots, most of the time they don't even like what they do...  from my future Space Hide & Seek.

 http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hit.bg, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov-Fan-Page-Strategic-Book-Group/121092637984053,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qUA8Avl7ew

www.allanbard.blogspot.com

http://www.flickr.com/photos/allanbard/,

www.allanbard.wordpress.com

http://www.goodreads.com/user/show/4159102-ivan-stoikov-allan-bard, www.shelfari.com/allanbard

jokes for the weekend :)

An old couple liked to play hide and seek. In the morning, the old lady hid the bottle with whiskey, and if the old man could find it, then at the evening the old woman had to hide...

Do you want to do good for the society? To make many young women run after you? Or to make dozens of people wait for your appearance even in the sever weather? Join our team! The public transport looks for drivers...

"Hello, land team? It's flight 365, we want to land immediately..."
"But why? You flew off 5 minutes ago..."
"Our stew forgot to switch off her iron at home..."

As strange as it may sound, the best gift/b-day present for a teenager would be a participation in a movie, where he/she could play the part of the bad character... Then and only then, he/she could say aloud all the bad and foul curses without any bad consequences... ;) my future The Origin Of Gods.
Hope these jokes could be a good beginning of the weekend :)! Take care, everyone!

http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://allanbard.hit.bg,  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qUA8Avl7ew,

http://www.allanbard.blogspot.com, www.allanbard.wordpress.com,

 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov/121092637984053?sk=wall,

http://www.shelfari.com/allanbard, myspace.com/ivan_allanbard,